Aiming for an ideal couple in which everything is peace and harmony is risky: it is precisely the presence of passion that makes the difference between a lively relationship and one that is a little obvious.
Contradictions feed love, artificial serenity extinguishes it.
The way to hell is paved with good intentions, they say. What does it mean? That very often we implement apparently right actions which turn out to be completely wrong.
This is the case with many people who give themselves the wrong answers to solve their relationship problems.
At first glance, the solution inevitably seems obvious: a couple who is arguing is not happy and therefore breaking up seems to be the only viable path.
But the soul does not work in this way, it does not live in the world of causes, but in a mysterious realm where opposite aspects of the personality coexist, irremediable contradictions only for the rational mind that claims to govern and control everything, including feelings.
In every authentic love there is struggle and passion.
We rightly ask ourselves: what is my soul telling me by sending me the pain I feel now, this lack, this nostalgia for him, for her, which concerns his body, his smell, the hugs, the silences and, last but not least , sexuality? He is saying that the foundations on which a couple's building stands are not what we think, they have nothing to do with a sweetened and artificial idea of human relationships.
Intimacy is what unites two people most of all, to the point that litigation can make each other more desirous of each other.
It's not the fights that kill the couple.
This is because deep down, the anger of quarrels and the fire of passion are two faces of the same energy, the strength that keeps us alive.
Unfortunately, if we are prey to clichés that consider a healthy couple the one who never fights and a bad couple the one who does, we will end up acting contrary to our "interest" or giving counterproductive advice.
Who can say that, in a certain period, the couple doesn't really need an extra dose of quarrels, perhaps to get both of them out of a dangerous routine and torpor? Why judge now, instead of perceiving and waiting?
Eros unites, thought divides.
Like it or not, two people are not together because "they have a common life plan", as a cliché states, or because they are esteemed, get along well and share the same tastes or interests.
They are together because a mysterious and cosmic force, Eros, unites them and this force goes beyond everything our rational mind puts in place to make things go according to a predetermined plan.
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