Dedicated to women: In imposing a choice or behavior that you consider correct, but at the cost of sacrificing a deep desire, you face certain suffering.

True intentions in a relationship: what to do.

Imagine having to resolve an excruciating inconsistency. 

You have met a person you like very much and who has awakened a strong sexual desire in you. 

You are very torn because you are with your first love, to which you say you are still very close: “He was the first with whom I lived intimacy. Initially I was very shy and embarrassed, then a complicity was created that gives me security. " 

He is also very affectionate and present, he encourages and supports you in your daily life, so much so that he has instilled in him the doubt that you are addicted to a situation of convenience: "I'm afraid I need protection. 

I realize that I don't have a real desire for him: I don't like his face, his look, the smell of him, and under the sheets I can't even look at him. 

However, I can not leave it because I feel that I would miss someone who knows me and loves me even without make-up and with home sweaters, and then we have a wonderful physical complicity. I'm not sure that with the other it would be like this ... "

The more you suppress a desire, the more he imprisons you. 

Curious than a woman. you talk about a wonderful physical complicity with a partner who in bed cannot even look you in the face!

 

But that's not all: “What makes me sad the most is that I have never been able to have a complete relationship: I feel very strong pain and I block it immediately. 

 

The gynecologist said it's okay, it's just a psychological issue and now I'm afraid my body is trying to tell me that he was never the right person. " Not only that: the more you try to resist, the more the desire for the other becomes intense. “A few days ago I wrote him burning lines of desire: I felt good when I did it. 

 

I dream of being carried away by this passion but at the same time I feel terrible when I think about leaving my partner and so I freeze. " Thus, one takes refuge "in the sense of guilt, finding, in this way, a useful tool to contain one's passion. 

 

What strikes, in reality, is not so much the desire for this" new man ", but the useless efforts made to avoid to indulge ...

If you don't indulge in desire, you live halfway! 

The fear of letting go of desire seems confirmed by the intentions that a person, in this case a woman, gives birth as a result of the sense of guilt behind which she shields herself: "I tried to avoid it but I can't, yet in the evenings I spend with my usual partner I am calm and I plan to think only of him; but when I see the other I go crazy. 

I wish I could listen to my body because this conflict confines me to a limbo that precludes me from living fully. 

I feel that my life is bringing me back here again because even last year I was burning with desire for another who, however, did not give me hope and after several months it passed away. " 

Periodically, therefore, it may happen that you feel the need to live a mature and complete erotic relationship that allows you to fully develop your sexuality and to access an experience of an erotically active woman, without taking refuge in the role of the "girl" in need of encouragement and protection. which gives it security but turns it off. 

Only by indulging her desire and leaving aside the feelings of guilt (which do not really concern the partner, but the image of a good woman that one would like to preserve) will she finally be able to get out of the limbo in which she finds herself floating.